I'm a single black mother that is raising a wonderful lil boy!!!
Well every since Iíve had the abnormal EKG, Iíve been really thinking about me and my sonís future. If for some strange reason I die before heís 18, I want to make sure he is taken care of. I wanted to check into getting a will made out. So me and some of the co-workers were talking about making a will. I was a lil shocked at what they told me.
1. Even if I have a will and my son is under 18 years of age, he still has one living parent, his father will automatically get custody.
2. Whatever I leave my son behind, his father can go in front of a judge and say that he is having a hard time financially and make up some reason why he needs money (i.e.: my sonís schooling, clothing, and all that stuff) and they will award him money outta his trust. The only way to get around that is to leave it someone else's name (my mother)that I know would do the right thing with the money.
3. The only way that I can designate who gets custody of him is if for some reason his father dies as well or he signs over his rights.
So of course I had to find out if his father would do this. I brought it to him in a subtle way and this is his true responses:
Me: If I was to die tomorrow, what would you do with my son?
Him: Well I would take care of him the best way I can.
Me: Well Iím sorry, thatís not good enough.
Him: Iíd do what I gotta do.
Me: Okay Iím alive and your not doing ďwhat you gotta doĒ, so how can I feel better at knowing if I die you will take care of him?
Him: Iíll do the best I can.
Me: Thatís still not working. Ok letís say my mother wanted custody of him, would you be willing to give my son to her?
Him: Pauses......Yeah I would have no problem in doing that for your mom.
Me: Well the only way that you can do that is if you sign over the rights to her.
Him: Why the fuck would I wanna do that? Iíd be less of a man signing over my kid!!!
Me: Ok I need a guarantee that my son is gonna be ok if I die. Right now in reality, youíre not doing your job. If you were, we wouldnít be having this conversation!!!
Him: You make me feel like I ainít shit.
Me: Well like I said, if you were doing things that I needed you to do, we wouldnít even be discussing this.
Him: Well Iíve got some things in the works right now.
Me: You know youíve been having things in the works since he was born. As far as Iím concerned, your words donít mean shit to me any more!!! Iíve heard your fucking words for 4 Ĺ years and frankly Iím tired. Letís just think about if you were in my shoes, your main goal would be to make sure heís taken care of. And I feel more comfortable knowing that he is in the care of my mother....period!!!
So people letís just say that I really pissed him off to the fullest, but guess whatÖ.I DONíT GIVE A FUCK!! And hopefully before this year is over, I will get my will and the S.O.B. will sign over his rights!!!!
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